Archive - Aug 2009


don't get her started on splenda

19 [+ / -]     Aug 12, 2009

  • Middle aged mom: (referring to a 5-hour energy shot) Don't ever drink these. They will make your brain bleed. They will kill you.
  • Little Boy: Okay.
  • Cashier: How can I help you, ma'am?
  • Middle aged mom: Yeah, can I get a carton of Camels, unfiltered?

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and your buddy's shoes

9 [+ / -]     Aug 24, 2009

  • (After walking out of the shadows behind a building)
  • Drunk Guy: Underdog law, I now own that bank.

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only one?

11 [+ / -]     Aug 27, 2009

  • Guy 1: I like a wholesome girl.
  • Guy 2: I like a girl with a hole.

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