Quotes Filed Under "Walkers"


guess who's not getting hired by the nsa?

3 [+ / -]     Mar 17, 2010

  • Dude: (looking at the baked goods) How much for the muffins?
  • Dude's friend: Is that code, or are you serious?

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and his face is the kleenex

-6 [+ / -]     Jul 31, 2009

  • (Eavesdropping on a loud, drunken conversation between two guys in the next booth)
  • Guy: It's like I'm holding a sneeze, except the sneeze is my fist.

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there's so much to say...

53 [+ / -]     Apr 04, 2009

  • (In the men's room, Dave Matthews is playing)
  • Fratty: Oh man, Dave Matthews!
  • Guy: Yes, one of the few musicians that can mumble and still make millions. Don't get me wrong, he's good though.
  • Fratty: Yeah, man! I used to beat off to Dave Matthews when I was 14.

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apparently it's working

66 [+ / -]     Aug 31, 2008

  • Bartender: You look sparkly.
  • Girl: Yeah, I'm sweaty.
  • Bartender: That's to draw attention to your boobs, isn't it?
  • Girl: (pause) Yeah.

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oranges are a part of this balanced breakfast

167 [+ / -]     Feb 29, 2008

  • Guy: Can I get an orange slice with this beer?
  • Bartender: Sure. I have to go and cut one up. I'm not used to serving beer at ten forty five in the morning.

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